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Just Here for the Ambience
Characters order full meals, talk for a few minutes and then leave without eating any of the food or paying the bill.

GILBERT SMITH, THOREAU, N.M.
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	reviews Dinner for Schmucks (PG-13) Some people are bigger schmucks than others The truly goofy comes shrouded in innocence. If a man is trying to be goofy, it's just an act that quickly grows old. But if he lacks the slightest notion of his peculiarity, there's the secret. The blissful ignorance of Barry Speck is beyond pitiful and ascends to a kind of nobility. He's one of those who truly doesn't have a clue. Best Worst Movie (Unrated) I see no reason to doubt the claim of "Troll 2" I bought the DVD of “Troll 2” because a friend advised me to see it. “You’re busy,” he told me. “You don’t have time to see every bad movie. So you might as well see the worst of all time.” Yes, “Troll 2” has a coveted zero percent rating on the Tomatometer: the lowest-rated film ever made. A critic could become the most-hated person in fan circles by awarding it even half a star and spoiling the perfection of that zero. Farewell (Unrated) The war that came in from the cold You have your choice of superior Cold War espionage thrillers in theaters this week: Phillip Noyce's “Salt,” a fantastical action spectacular with Angelina Jolie as an ice-cool acrobatic superspy confronting long-dormant sleeper cells of Russian agents in the United States, and Christian Carion's “Farewell,” the formerly top-secret true story of two men, a Frenchman and a KGB colonel, who smuggled Soviet secrets to the West and helped, as the film's foreword phrases it, put an end “to a world dominated by two opposing powers.” Salt (PG-13) Now HERE's what I mean by an action movie "Salt" is a damn fine thriller. It does all the things I can't stand in bad movies, and does them in a good one. It's like a rebuke to all the lousy action movie directors who've been banging pots and pans together in our skulls. It winds your clock tight and the alarm doesn't go off for 100 minutes. Ramona and Beezus (G) It wasn't my fault! I was just standing here! Kids who started reading anytime between the 1950s and today may know the books of Beverly Cleary, and at 94, she's still writing. Her books are set on Klickitat Street in Portland, Ore., a real street not far from her childhood home; she must have filed it away for future reference. Agora (Unrated) Christians 1 library, Pagans 0 I went to see "Agora" expecting an epic with swords, sandals and sex. I found swords and sandals, some unexpected opinions about sex, and a great deal more. This is a movie about ideas, a drama based on the ancient war between science and superstition. At its center is a woman who in the fourth century A.D. was a scientist, mathematician, philosopher, astronomer and teacher, respected in Egypt, although women were not expected to be any of those things. Mercy (Unrated) There's more than just getting laid I have a problem with movies about men who women cannot resist. If a man knows that, how did he find it out? By succeeding with one woman after another? If he's 35, never been married and doesn't like to date the same woman twice, he probably has a problem, and he probably is a problem. Even in a town as big as Los Angeles, word would get around. You wouldn't want to be the woman watched by everyone in the room to see if you fall for the Irresistible Man. Inception (PG-13) Dreams on top of dreams inside dreams It's said that Christopher Nolan spent ten years writing his screenplay for "Inception." That must have involved prodigious concentration, like playing blindfold chess while walking a tight-wire. The film's hero tests a young architect by challenging her to create a maze, and Nolan tests us with his own dazzling maze. We have to trust him that he can lead us through, because much of the time we're lost and disoriented. Nolan must have rewritten this story time and again, finding that every change had a ripple effect down through the whole fabric. Wild Grass (Unrated) Everything is one accident after another "Wild Grass" is about an unlikely and fateful chain of events that to a young person might seem like coincidence but to an older one illustrates the likelihood that most of what happens in our lives comes about by sheer accident. This is the latest work by Alain Resnais, who may have learned this by experience: There’s a springtime in your life when you think it should add up and make sense, and an autumn when you think, the hell with it, anything can happen. Something Better Somewhere Else (Unrated) Moving on hopefully "Something Better Somewhere Else" is a delightful film, and in some stretches, a flawless one. It tells four stories, each one immediately engaging, and gets in and out without overstaying its welcome. In a world of bloated and dumbed-down entertainment, here's a movie with the quickness and acute observation of a good short story. great movies Mystery Train (R) (1989) And the ghost of Elvis hovers over all At nights in the summertime I heard lonesome whistles blowing, and dreamed of taking the train to the future. To romance. To the rest of my life. Or just simply out of town. Trains embody the fact of travel, the sense of moving through time and space and day and night. Airplanes are elevators whose doors close and then open in another city. The two Japanese kids in Jim Jarmusch's "Mystery Train" (1989) have the right idea. They're on a train to Memphis. With one suitcase suspended on a pole between them, they wander the bedraggled streets until passing by accident the door of the Sun record studios, which is a shrine for them. Overlooked DVD of the Week Something Wicked This Way Comes (PG-13) Dark's Pandemonium Carnival The opening scenes of "Something Wicked This Way Comes" might remind you a little of Orson Welles' "The Magnificent Ambersons." Both films begin with a nostalgic memory of what it was like to grow up in a small Midwestern town, back before everything became modern and a sense of wonder was lost. letters Stanley Kubrick knew how I would someday eat » Scanners On liking and not liking (Part Deux) I greatly appreciated A.O. Scott's NY Times piece last Sunday, under the headline "Everybody's a Critic Of the Critics' Rabid Critics." (And not just because he had kind words for me and Dennis, though I most certainly appreciate that, too.) The article was about the curious reception of "Inception" (before it even opened), and the critical rush to proclaim it either a masterpiece or a disaster. As if it could only have been one or the other. Salt: It's a movie! It's a spy! It's a nuclear antiproliferation treaty! Toy Story 4: Your Mad Men Barbie dolls are here Where I'm coming from... Following: Nolan in a nutshell Yeah, yeah, oh yeah... Inception theories: Two key shots and others' thoughts The Social Network: A short film that's also a trailer Incepción... starring Dora the Explorer Inception: Has Christopher Nolan forgotten how to dream? Notes on my homework assignments: The Prestige and Signs Inception: Block those reviews! > > > > visit jim emerson on twitter The Opening Shots Project Index		roger ebert's journal BP's tree fell on my lawn Help me out here. There's something I've been spending a couple of months trying to get my head around. Why does BP enjoy such a peculiar immunity after having apparently been culpable in the Gulf oil spill? What is the nature of its invisible protective shield? Whole lotta cantin' going on Can a film be great without question? Is it demented to find fault with "Inception?" Or "Citizen Kane?" Not at all. Scolds have emerged in recent days to smack at those critics who disapproved of "Inception," but as a fervent admirer of the film I can understand why others might not agree. In fact, the reasons cited by David Edelstein in his much-attacked negative review seem reasonable. I don't agree with him, but that's another matter. our far-flung correspondents Encounters at the End of the Mind Omer M. Mozaffar in Chicago: There are a few spoilers here. Because I am mentioning that there are spoilers, I am implying that there are things you do not want to know in advance, thus making you curious, thus lifting your expectations higher than they should be, thus making it harder for you to enjoy the film. So, enter at your own risk. To travel and live without reasons Seongyong Cho in Seoul: When I observed the lifestyle of Ryan Bingham in Jason Reitman's wonderful movie "Up in the Air" early in this year, Lawrence Kasdan's 1988 movie "The Accidental Tourist" came to my mind. Like Ryan, Macon Leary (William Hurt) knows a lot about traveling around by plane. He can tell you how to pack your bag as small as possible. thumbs recent Two Thumbs Up® reviews Linked here are reviews in recent months for which I wrote either 4 star or 3.5 star reviews. What does Two Thumbs Up mean in this context? It signifies that I believe these films are worth going out of your way to see, or that you might rent them, add them to your Netflix, Blockbuster or TiVo queues, or if they are telecast record them. the Your Movie Sucks™ files Gathered here in one convenient place are my recent reviews that awarded films Zero Stars, One-half Star, One Star, and One-and-a-half Stars. These are, generally speaking to be avoided. Sometimes I hear from readers who confess they are in the mood to watch a really bad movie on some form of video. If you are sincere, be sure to know what you're getting: A really bad movie. in theaters latest reviews Agora Mercy Ramona and Beezus Salt Best Worst Movie Dinner for Schmucks Farewell more current releases » One-minute movie reviews still playing The A-Team Accomplices Agora Best Worst Movie Cell 211 Coco Chanel and Igor Stravinsky Cyrus Daddy Longlegs Despicable Me Dinner for Schmucks Dogtooth Farewell Get Him to the Greek The Girl Who Played with Fire Grown Ups Holy Rollers I am Love Inception Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work Jonah Hex The Karate Kid The Kids are All Right The Killer Inside Me Knight and Day The Last Airbender Love Ranch Marmaduke Mercy Micmacs La Mission 9500 Liberty October Country OSS 117: Lost in Rio Predators Putty Hill Ramona and Beezus Restrepo Salt A Small Act A Small Act Solitary Man Something Better Somewhere Else The Sorcerer's Apprentice Splice Toy Story 3 The Twilight Saga: Eclipse The Twilight Saga: Eclipse Wild Grass The Wild Hunt Winter's Bone more current releases » on dvd new on dvd Vincere (7/27) The Secret of the Grain (7/27) Repo Men (7/27) The Runaways (7/20) Mother (7/20) Terribly Happy (7/13) Our Family Wedding (7/13) Greenberg (7/13) The Greatest (7/13) Formosa Betrayed (7/13) more new on dvd » coming on dvd Diary of a Wimpy Kid (8/3) The Ghost Writer (8/3) more coming on dvd » great movies on dvd Mystery Train (7/21) The Red Shoes (7/20) Come and See (6/16) Walkabout (5/18) Viridiana (4/29) Vivre sa Vie / My Life to Live (4/20) Gone With the Wind (4/13) more great movies on dvd » ebert's dvd commentaries Buy now » Buy now » Buy now » Buy now » Buy now » Buy now »